fuck – Page 5 – TDLBallistic's Shitpost Emporium

bundibird:

p5stuck:

winchestersons:

ARE YOU TELLING ME

THAT WE WERE PLAGUED

BY THAT FREAKING POST

FOR WEEKS

WHEN WE

COULD’VE

HAD

THIS????

#it’s like the ios7 update for a post

“Plagued by that post for weeks” – weeks?? WEEKS? Try YEARS. The damn thing STILL shows up on my dash and it has literally been years.

sicktier:

spectrology:

infinity war is basically just [S] GAME OVER

artemispanthar:

Hey so do you think it takes Pearl so long to regenerate because she essentially has to battle through her Nine Circles of Repressed Traumatic Memories every time?

vedajuno:

selfsoulfriend:

selfsoulfriend:

bill and ted but with 2010s slang would be fucking lethal

this is most un-woke ted my dude

*both in unison* oh, biggest mood

starship-one:

starship-one:

Alchemy really is the minecraft of homestuck

slipher626:

longbeachgriffy:

when college students get robbed on campus

I’m fking crying at how perfect this was played out
like JFC give this dude an oscar

randomsplashes:

i feel attacked lmao

slunchy:

okay so a friend of mine gave me these magnetic letters to put on my fridge that he bought at a dollar store

and it has typical writing on it that you would expect to find on a dollar store alphabet set “helps children learn to spell” etc.

but after we opened it we saw the Z had been covering a message:

wh-

whjj whO IS yuoUR TARGET DEmoGRAPHiC

tiny-princess-catherine:

tiny-princess-catherine:

i love that people co-opted “looks bad todd” to refer to todd howard even though it was originally from the worst picture of food ever

wyomingnot:

lazaefair:

smarsupial:

dorkilybeautiful:

k-vichan:

mittensmorgul:

prairiedust:

hazeldomain:

prairiedust:

hazeldomain:

whitmerule:

soupernabturel:

majesticduxk:

So last week I tried moaning every time I ate something delicious.

It was vaguely uncomfortable and unnatural

I actually love the idea of doing this trying out fanfic/literary cliche’s out in real life, kinda wanna make up a list and undertake it as a challenge.

don’t forget to make your butthole flutter today

Guess someone’s eye color from 20 feet away.

Be careful with these. I started reading fanfiction three years ago and now I have to toe my shoes off to get my feet out.

But do you pad across rooms?

Yes but I often give away my position when I huff.

FYI, I’m smirking at all y’all.

I’m resisting the urge to card my fingers through everybody’s hair.

This is as good a time as any to admit that right now I smell like coffee, sandalwood soap, and something uniquely myself.

I hate this post so much I clenched my fists and looked away, muscles bunching in my jaw.

I actually have had more than one (male) partner try to battle my tongue for dominance. It’s extremely unsexy and annoying.

When I read this post, I let out the breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding.