theawkwardgayfanboy:

whointhehell:

whointhehell:

so today was my first day back at camp and this years basically my first year where im like being a full on girl at camp and so like i was with my group today which is mostly kids whove known me for like 3 years at this point and one kid who knows me less well and like this kids 9 right so he asks me if im a boy or a girl like right off the bat cuz well, hes 9. I tell him im a girl and one of the other kids is like What!? no youre not. and im like i sure am. Another kid asks “then why were you a boy last year?” im like getting ready to figure out how the hell im gonna explain this to a kid in like 4 seconds. and then another kid asks “omg was you pretending to be a boy just an elaborate joke you and the other counselors were playing on us?!??” i just kinda stand there and im like………………………… yes. they all get cracked up because they think me pretending to be a boy was like, the funniest, most long term prank that has ever been committed to them and like i gotta say, i wholeheartedly agree that being amab is just a fucking joke.

another kid was like “but wait? you had a girlfriend last year?” as if she thinks shes just seen through me by asking that simple question and i just say “sometimes girls have girlfriends” and she just nods like i just said the wisest fucking thing anyone has ever fucking said

haledamage:

waspabi:

lornacrowley:

blossomfae:

missvoltairine:

bradkey:

osmanthusoolong:

arminarlerted:

story time: i taught my little cousin her first longer word when she was very young. i taught her to say “tax benefits”. and to this day my aunt still doesn’t know where she got it from, but it was a hilarious sight to see a little toddler waddling around the house, wearing a big diaper, all the while yelling “TAX BENEFITS!!!!”

My parents did this with me and “nuclear disarmament”.

I taught my little brother to say “micro-surgical vasectomy reversal” (saw it on a billboard) on a road trip, and he didn’t stop saying it for literal years.

My parents taught me to chant “Get your laws off our bodies!” for a pro-choice rally when I was like four and I went to preschool and taught all the other kids the chant and led them on a mini-parade around the playground and the teachers were like ?????????? ?????????? ????????????

whenever my brother threw a tantrum as a baby my parents would chant “live free or die” until he calmed down it was fuckin weird

when i was a kid whenever we got stuck in traffic my dad would say “what the fuck?!?” in a very comic voice and i would repeat it and then he would say it with a slightly different inflection and i would repeat that too and so forth and so basically my poor mother would be stuck in standstill traffic listening to her husband and 4 yr old daughter swearing at each other without end

i’m a preschool teacher and we like to joke around using radical vocabulary with the children, the other day i overheard one kid say ‘this is my truck’ and the other one said ‘no, this truck belongs to the collective’; they all say it now

whenever anyone picks up my daughter or she goes upstairs, she announces “I ASCEND” it’s the best thing