good – Page 4 – TDLBallistic's Shitpost Emporium

burplesnurf2:

burplesnurf2:

burplesnurf2:

burplesnurf2:

the cha cha slide in full metal armor

“sliiide to the left”

*indescribably loud screeching of metal against asphalt*

“one hop this time”

*clonk*

“two hops this time”

*clonk clonk*

“everybody clap your hands!”

*clankclankclankclankclank*

yells-at-cats:

look at this fucking medieval oyster drawing i just found

lezbianz:

shittycryptids:

A frog that, when kissed by a beautiful princess, transforms into a slightly larger frog

op change your url

tramampoline:

This is a weird trilogy

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

Pillow 1: beneath my head

Pillow 2: between my knees

Pillow 3: the huggin’ pillow

Pillow 4: against my back to anchor me to this plane of reality

pillows 5-8 do not have formalized roles but are able to arrange themselves into a nest as needed

alolandunsparce:

this is my entire range of emotions thanks for showing up

soldierpallaton:

Tumblr users on April 25th, 2018: My ancestors are smiling on me Wikipedia. Can you say the same?

weirdlyprecious:

oh garnet…
baby steps!

sallydoge:

“I want an Easta egg. I want an Easta egg, I want an Eas…”
“Ohh NOOOOoooooo” ( Stiff arms child into darkness )

lukas-langs:

leggyboyjohnson:

transmedicalismkills:

istudypirates:

malkiewicz:

Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest that just sounds nice and cozy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods you’re going to die.

My favourite is explaining the difference between a butt dial and a booty call

It’s called connotations.

Try this one on for size:

“Forgive me, Father, I have sinned”

“Sorry, Daddy, I’ve been naughty”

great news! Language is now banned