nonlinear-nonsubjective:

swingsetindecember:

tv shows with time travel organizations/bureaus/police/agencies/whatever should have a department with instead of a tech genius eating candy, it’s a harried seamstress or fashion designer who is like

“1450 italy? does it look like I have the time to dye you wool? nO. YOU’RE GOING TO THE 1980s”

and throws shoulder pads at the hapless time agent

“I literally made three- THREE- 18th century corsets last week. You can wait until one of them gets back, or you can go sometime post-1920s, because if I have to sew one more god damn channel I will literally lose my mind.”

“Upper middle class?!?!? You told me upper class! FUCK YEAH THERE’S A DIFFERENCE!!!

“How about kimoNO.”

“Look me in the eyes. I do not care what you want. This is the 1500s. You absolutely cannot wear trousers.”

“Another court gown?? Here’s a novel idea: go as a peasant for once in your life. Why do you do this to me? You’re fucking sadists that’s why.”

“Don’t mind me, I’ll just be up all night hand painting silk.”

“THE POLICY IS ONE MONTH’S ADVANCE NOTICE ON PRE-1900s WOMEN’S FASHION FOR A REASON, DEBRA.”

honl:

honl:

honl:

honl:

honl:

honl:

There’s a big ass water snake living in my porch drain and I just want him to come out… Give him a smooch

LAD SPOTTED

Update: lad kisses camera

I’m gonna see if there’s anything on the other end of the drain

FJDHJDJSNDJD

ITS FREE REAL ESTATE

LOCAL BOY ACQUIRED

virizioncourse:

werewolf-pajamas:

wightlight:

imnotasweetie:

jean-bo-peep:

iwatobigreg:

c1efairy:

shouttogether:

hotfriend:

public high school things
•naruto kids
•kids punching windows
•kahoot
•"miss…..miss……c’mon"
•leaks coming from everywhere
•screams from every direction

•jeopardy review games
•chicken nuggets that are orange and all the same shape
•people fighting for no reason
•couples who make out in the hallway like they’re never gonna see each other again
•those kids who take the bathroom pass and disappear for half of class

•clapping in the middle of lunch for no reason?
•only going to the homecoming game
•being embarrassed by the student art in the hall
•that one teacher that no one calls mr./Mrs./miss/etc but instead just their last name
•hearing yelling from other classrooms and wondering wtf is going on????

– People who stop in the middle of the goddamn hallway
– That one kid who always has a winter coat on no matter what
– ‘Gay table’
– Kids who rap/blast rap music in the hallway
– “—– Please take off your hood/hat.”
– The bell doesn’t dismiss you I do
– We still have 3 minutes left don’t pack up yet or you’re getting a detention
– Mysterious ceiling stains
– Smoke coming out of the bathroom
-People who skip class and hide in the bathroom all period instead of leaving

  • those 3 kids who everyone knows are drug dealers
  • the secretary who is Tired
  • finding outdated memes printed out and pinned to the walls in teacher offices (ex: condescending willy wonka: “oh so that OTHER teacher didn’t give you homework?? i see”)
  • singing songs u learned in middle school language classes
  • the end of class is whenever someone shuffles their papers into a binder or moves their backpack, everyone else will follow like some freaky instinctual mimicry shit

have u ever seen something so american like… wtf

This all sounds so fucking weird…

You mean this isn’t normal

I have experienced every single one of these

daismonius:

iguanamouth:

bertb0t:

antique-symbolism:

bertb0t:

antique-symbolism:

Imagine a dragon at Antiques Roadshow, appraising its hoard

Imagine the dragon hoards monetarily worthless things like newspapers or old bones and the person appraising it getting more and more nervous about telling the dragon their stuff isnt worth anything

Imagine that the dragon knows this and just likes watching the person squirm.

The dragon actually hoards uncomfortable situations

I just love it when people come up with random weird animal or dragon things and iguanamouth illustrates them just because.