Now listen, you rich people, weep and wail because of the misery that is coming on you. Your wealth has rotted, and moths have eaten your clothes. Your gold and silver are corroded. Their corrosion will testify against you and eat your flesh like fire. You have hoarded wealth in the last days. Look! The wages you failed to pay the workers who mowed your fields are crying out against you. The cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord Almighty. You have lived on earth in luxury and self-indulgence. You have fattened yourselves in the day of slaughter. You have condemned and murdered the innocent one, who was not opposing you.— James 5:1-6
At first I thought this was an angry Tumblr post but then it turned out to be the Literal Bible and it got 1000x better
I could use this as a curse. The words of the bible have enough collective force behind them that I can probably get some decent effect from it too.
Honestly probably just saying it out loud will cause ructions of shock and alarm!
Why on earth hasn’t anyone invented a less terrifying way to open biscuits and cinnamon rolls???? 😩
because squishing that much biscuit into that little space teeters on the edge of hubris. the pop is to keep us humble. to remind us that death comes for all
Baby boomer goals: home ownership, 2.5 kids, dream vacations to florida/hawaii
Millenial goals: having any money left after bills, an apartment without roommates, dying quickly and painlessly in the initial nuclear exchange to avoid witnessing the collapse of humanity
i love that i have to go to menswear to find a shirt a human being in the world would wear and then when i do it takes me .5 seconds to find it. I love that
me: i need a plain black t shirt
target women’s section: would you like to have a giant scoop neck that would definitely like completely show at least one of your boobs. would you, an adult woman, like to wear a crop top? would you like to look like a human piñata. BLACK? I think you mean jewel tones babey!
target men’s section: yeah sure. it’s the first thing you see as you walk into the shirt aisle. have a good one
Women’s section: would you like a shirt made out of tissue paper that costs $34.99??
Men’s section: here’s 25 normal tshirts for a quarter
Women’s Section: Would you like to play fucking guessing games with our arbitrary sizing systems and style names? Also, we added a bunch of fake pockets for your personal inconvenience!
Men’s Section: Here’s a bunch of pants organized by the exact inch length of your waist and legs. With pockets that can hold more than just a credit card.
joel’s daughter’s death has got to be one of the rawest scenes in a game like fuck they just throw it at you right at the start
I remember reading or seeing somewhere that originally, the game was set to begin in media res, with the revelations about Joel’s past coming later. They changed it, partially, it seems, as a way of using Sarah’s POV to orient us into the world from a place we understand, then abruptly ending her life to communicate the brutal code of the story, which is that no one is safe. Not even the innocents.
TDLBallistic's Shitpost Emporium 